"His touch, his smell, his soft grin...Just him holding me the way he does gives me hope that I can leave the past exactly where it is...behind me..."

Love Just Don't Love Me

If Love loved me 

It wouldn't hurt.

Love would embrace me,

It would hold me at night.

Love would protect me,

Keep me away from all my fears.

If Love loved me

It would tell me everyday.

Love would give me hope,

Embracing all that I am.

But I learned awhile ago,

Love don't love me. 

Love betrays me,

Eating at me until nothing is left.

Love abuses me,

Causing wounds that heal,

But the pain never stops.

Love takes advantage,

Not caring how it destroys me.

Love never believed in me,

So I never believe in myself.

I won't spend another moment on Love,

It weakens the soul

And breaks the heart.

Why should I love Love,

When Love just don't love me?

What Up B?!

STILL the Hottest Chick In The Game!

The Girl I Once Was...

What I would give to feel beautiful again. To look in the mirror and admire what I see. To feel indispensable and unmatched. What I would give to love myself again. To have faith in all that I am. To believe that I am capable of the impossible. What I would give to be me again. Once a girl with dreams as big as the sky, unwavering hope and vision, I have slowly faded into nothingness. I have no idea who I am, or what my purpose is anymore. I am still young, yet I feel like I've aged immensely in the past few years. The wear and tear reflecting back at me every morning. The stains of tears soaked into my pillow when I lie down at night. I don't even sleep anymore. I guess I am afraid for the current day to end because it seems each new day things just seem to get worse. And my obsession with the pain inside is not letting up. I spend hours questioning why I have been damaged so many times. I have no desire to even be a good person anymore. Being good has not prevented the hurt. Being good just leaves me dazed and confused with my fate. They say God would not give you anything you can't handle, but God, I can't handle this. I cannot even let anyone else be apart of my life due to the fear that disappointment will follow. I want to smile again because I am actually happy. I want to cry tears of joy for the first time in my life. I want to hold someone's hand that is proud of me. I want to be excited about life and all its possibilities. I am trapped in a state of unhappiness with myself and I am searching for a way out. I can no longer pretend like things are good, I don't remember the last time I walked with my head held high.

I want to live.

Broken Hearts & Betrayal

Heartbreak is a subject I am all too familiar with. For some reason, it seems that if there is a way to have a heart broken, I have experienced it. My problem is, that after every heartbreak, I never give my heart time to mend or heal, almost like there's still small cracks left in the pavement that are just setting me up for the destroying devastation of the next heartbreak. We all long for love, especially women. We fall into the desire of being wanted and adored, and often times this causes us to settle for less than we deserve. Settling for less is the worst thing to do because it pretty much guarantees that you will never be as happy as you could be, if you're even happy at all. I am working on a blog post touching on everything that we do wrong when it comes to love, but this was just a little taste...
Here are some pics that remind me of the subject:

Evening Thoughts

"For a moment, we were one and complete, but now we are just two people trying to forget the other ever existed."  -Sabrina

I'm Back! Sorry for the Hiatus!

So, I was deathly sick, and on top of that, had to deal with unreal legal drama, but I'm good now, and will be posting daily again!

Trailer Tuesdays:Harry Potter & the Deathly Hollows Part 1

I cannot wait until November 19th!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Halloween

Happy Halloween everyone! Even though mostly everyone went out last night to celebrate, today all the cute kids in their adorable and creative costumes will be out, so make sure you have tons of candy! In honor of this unofficial holiday, here are some pumpkins I like...What can I say, I'm a label whore! LoLz! Be Safe!

YSL, Chanel, Louis, OH MY!!!!

Like A Kid Again: Hello Kitty

This post is dedicated to my beautiful lil sis (I adopted her), Porcha :)

Who doesn't love Hello Kitty?! This simple little character is a worldwide phenomenon, with everyone from toddlers to grown women obsessing over her. She's adorable, simple, and there's any and every product made with her branding! I just recently purchased a great decal for my Macbook (pictured below). Check out the dozens of products, including a car, toilet, computer, champagne, even Mac makeup have branded themselves with the power of the Kitty!

I have no idea where I found this or who designed it, but whoever you are, kudos! It is dope!

Beat My Face: Nars Cosmetics

People who know me best know that I have an addition to luxurious cosmetics, they're like a drug for me. My 'drug' of choice has to be NARS. I have loved the cosmetics line from the first time I tried it back in 2004. On the expensive side, it is definitely worth the cost because the quality and final results are incredible. The colors, textures, tones are perfect for all skin types. I have very oily skin and tend to get blemishes in the fall/winter time, and the products from NARS help to reduce the visibility and actually help to clear up my skin at the same time. My personal daily regimen includes:

Makeup Primer SPF 20, $33

After I wash my face with my AMBI products, I use a natural Witch Hazel astringent and then I apply a thin layer of Makeup Primer. This is a necessity prior to makeup application because it helps give a flawless finish and protects your skin from environmental damage.

Concealer $22

A must have for the blemished areas, especially under the eyes. Gives crease-resistant coverage. I personally use the toffee color, but there is a perfect color for every skin tone.

Sheer Matte Foundation $42

I adore this foundation because it is perfect for oily skin. It controls and prevents oil thru the day. It is very light and feels like nothing is on the skin. Gives an overall beautiful look and fresh feel. My color is New Guinea Sheer Matte.

For an added flawless look, I also use the Pressed Powder $32. It just gives a nice clear look over the foundation and evens out the overall skin tone. My color is Jamaica.

Blush $26

 is so beautiful and highlights the cheek bone area. I use Taj Mahal, which is a gorgeous orange and bronze toned blush which really pops on my skin tone. I also love Orgasm, which is one of the best colors ever...And my lover, Drake, raps about it! LoLz!

Single Eye Shadow $22

There are so many amazingly beautiful colors of eyeshadows that NARS provides, and I am addicted to all of them. But my daily eyeshadow is Bali, which is a deep bronze and gold shadow. I always get so many compliments when wearing it. It looks amazing on golden brown skin tones.

Lip Gloss $24

Love Love Love NARS lip gloss options! Smooth finish, and looks amazing. I wear Supervixen as part of my daily look, it's an amazing shimmering nude beige color. 

Eyebrow Pencil $20

This eyebrow pencil makes eyebrows look flawless and perfect. I like the Jodhpur color, but there are a few options available.

Please keep in mind that these are just the items I use on a daily basis. When I want to stand out, I try the dozens of lip glosses, shadows, blushes, etc. As far as mascara, NARS makes a couple of amazing options, but I opt for Christian Dior Diorshow Blackout. My eyeliner is MAC Smolder. NARS has amazing options for every product so please go to the nearest NARS counter and let one of the wonderful Makeup Artists try some things out on you, you're guaranteed to fall in love! 

Here are a few pics of various NARS campaigns and products: