Love Just Don't Love Me

If Love loved me 

It wouldn't hurt.

Love would embrace me,

It would hold me at night.

Love would protect me,

Keep me away from all my fears.

If Love loved me

It would tell me everyday.

Love would give me hope,

Embracing all that I am.

But I learned awhile ago,

Love don't love me. 

Love betrays me,

Eating at me until nothing is left.

Love abuses me,

Causing wounds that heal,

But the pain never stops.

Love takes advantage,

Not caring how it destroys me.

Love never believed in me,

So I never believe in myself.

I won't spend another moment on Love,

It weakens the soul

And breaks the heart.

Why should I love Love,

When Love just don't love me?

What Up B?!

STILL the Hottest Chick In The Game!

The Girl I Once Was...

What I would give to feel beautiful again. To look in the mirror and admire what I see. To feel indispensable and unmatched. What I would give to love myself again. To have faith in all that I am. To believe that I am capable of the impossible. What I would give to be me again. Once a girl with dreams as big as the sky, unwavering hope and vision, I have slowly faded into nothingness. I have no idea who I am, or what my purpose is anymore. I am still young, yet I feel like I've aged immensely in the past few years. The wear and tear reflecting back at me every morning. The stains of tears soaked into my pillow when I lie down at night. I don't even sleep anymore. I guess I am afraid for the current day to end because it seems each new day things just seem to get worse. And my obsession with the pain inside is not letting up. I spend hours questioning why I have been damaged so many times. I have no desire to even be a good person anymore. Being good has not prevented the hurt. Being good just leaves me dazed and confused with my fate. They say God would not give you anything you can't handle, but God, I can't handle this. I cannot even let anyone else be apart of my life due to the fear that disappointment will follow. I want to smile again because I am actually happy. I want to cry tears of joy for the first time in my life. I want to hold someone's hand that is proud of me. I want to be excited about life and all its possibilities. I am trapped in a state of unhappiness with myself and I am searching for a way out. I can no longer pretend like things are good, I don't remember the last time I walked with my head held high.

I want to live.

Broken Hearts & Betrayal

Heartbreak is a subject I am all too familiar with. For some reason, it seems that if there is a way to have a heart broken, I have experienced it. My problem is, that after every heartbreak, I never give my heart time to mend or heal, almost like there's still small cracks left in the pavement that are just setting me up for the destroying devastation of the next heartbreak. We all long for love, especially women. We fall into the desire of being wanted and adored, and often times this causes us to settle for less than we deserve. Settling for less is the worst thing to do because it pretty much guarantees that you will never be as happy as you could be, if you're even happy at all. I am working on a blog post touching on everything that we do wrong when it comes to love, but this was just a little taste...
Here are some pics that remind me of the subject:

Evening Thoughts

"For a moment, we were one and complete, but now we are just two people trying to forget the other ever existed."  -Sabrina

I'm Back! Sorry for the Hiatus!

So, I was deathly sick, and on top of that, had to deal with unreal legal drama, but I'm good now, and will be posting daily again!